Random & Incoherent
Monday, February 27, 2006
  Daily Chuck
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  Mural in Men's Restroom
We all know that women have been held back and underpaid in the
workplace.

Edge Designs is an all women run company that designs interior
office space.

They had a recent opportunity to do an office project in NYC.
The client allowed the women of this company a free hand in
all design aspects. The client was a company that was also
run by all women execs.............The result............well.......

We all know that men never talk ...never look at each other....
and never laugh much in the restroom....The men's room is a
serious and quiet place............But now ..with the addition of
one mural on the wall......lets just say the men's restroom is
a place of laughter and smiles...





As submitted by: BP
 
Friday, February 24, 2006
  I'm special

Yet another gem from Raj, as taken from the infamous going away party
 
  Off the grid
I'll be in Raleigh for the weekend, attending my Brother-In-Law's wedding reception. I'm sure that I'll ahve plenty to post after the weekend.
 
  Daily Chuck
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
Thursday, February 23, 2006
  Daily Chuck
Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  lethal injection = cruel & unusual
Michael Morales has escaped death, for now. It appears that California'’s other 645 inmates will also get indefinite postponements while a court decides if lethal injection is cruel and unusual punishment.

Horse shit

We've moved away from public hangings, firing squads, and even ol' sparky due to claims of "cruel and unusual". We moved towards the lethal injection method of execution to ensure that the criminal condemned to death doesn't feel anything and silently slips into a forever slumber.

In the case of Morales, as most other death sentences, there was undeniable violence. This was not vehicular manslaughter or accidental death or even killing in self defense. The victim was raped and murdered. Why do we care if a mistake in the sedation process might mean he would appear unconscious, but internally would succumb to excruciating pain once the paralyzing and the death drug were administered? I'm only guessing here, but I'm pretty sure that Terri Winchell wasn't getting massaged and enjoying a cocktail at the time of her death.

Then again, I almost subscribe to the "eye for an eye" theory.

We're already aware of my stance on the death penalty and the bottom line is that it isn't utilized enough, or for that matter in any form of swiftness.

The simple fact that Morales, as well as others that think execution is unconstitutional, fail to see the point. Prior to the Constitution, another document told us that killing was not right. Remember that one? Yeah, the Ten Commandments.

That's right, I pulled the "God" trump card. Whatcha gonna do about it?
 
  Fun with politicians
If you think that the only way Dick Cheney can hurt you is with a gun, you're about to be schooled:


I'm pretty sure that Chuck Norris taught Cheney everything he knows.

And unless Dick Cheney shot you too, i'd still rather:

Question is, how long will Cheney continue to catch grief? As long as Kennedy?
 
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
  Daily Chuck
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  What was i thinking?
You can thank Raj for this one

Proving once again that I am indeed a fan of self-deprecating humor
 
  Not quite a contract, but possibly more acceptable than "Wifely Expectations"

The Guys' Rules

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally , the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear
"the rules "
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are
perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem
only If you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a
problem
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the
Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted
two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the
other one .

1. You can either ask us to do something,
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did
NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have
no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it
will Be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine...
Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or
golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.
Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.


 
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
  Sicko "Marriage Contract" One For The Ages
For those of you that were enraged by the Pre-Nup post, now you can take ten minutes, read the entire Wifely Expectations Contract, and really get mad.

Gotta hand it to the guy for being so detail oriented though.
 
  Daily Chuck
The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  Daniel Clay's Letter to His Family
This was sent to me in an email and I thought it was worth posting. Whether it is propaganda or not, it definitely gives you something that you won't hear from liberal media.

Pulled from the Keyt Law site

U.S. Marine SSgt. Daniel Clay was killed in action in Iraq on December 1, 2005. Before leaving home for his second tour in Iraq, Sgt Clay left a letter with his family and an instruction to open the letter only in the event of his death. After Clay's death, his father Bud wrote the following letter to President Bush:

December 7, 2005
President George Bush,
The White House,
Washington, DC.

DEAR PRESIDENT BUSH:

My name is Bud Clay. My son, SSgt Daniel Clay--USMC was killed last week, 12/01/05, in Iraq. He was one of the ten Marines killed by the IED in Fallujah.

Dan was a Christian--he knew Jesus as Lord and Savior--so we know where he is. In his final letter (one left with me for the family--to be read in case of his death) he says "if you are reading this, it means my race is over." He's home now--his and our real home.

I am writing to you--to tell you how proud and thankful we (his parents and family) are of you and what you are trying to do to protect us all. This was Dan's second tour in Iraq--he knew and said that his being there was to protect us.

I want to encourage you. I hear in your speeches about "staying the course". I also know that many are against you in this "war on Terror" and that you must get weary in the fight to do what is right. We and many others are praying for you to see this through--as Lincoln said, "that these might not have died in vain".

You have a heavy load--we are praying for you.

God bless you,
BUD CLAY


Text of Sgt. Daniel Clay's Letter to His Family

MOM, DAD, KRISTIE, JODIE, KIMBERLY, ROBERT, KATY, RICHARD, AND MY LISA:

Boy do I love each and every one of you. This letter being read means that I have been deemed worthy of being with Christ. With MaMa Jo, MaMa Clay, Jennifer .... all those we have been without for our time during the race. This is not a bad thing. It is what we hope for. The secret it out. He lives and His promises are real! It is not faith that supports this .... but fact and I now am a part of the promise. Here is notice! Wake up! All that we hope for is Real. Not a hope. But Real.

But here is something tangible. What we have done in Iraq is worth any sacrifice. Why? Because it was our duty. That sounds simple. But all of us have a duty. Duty is defined as a God given task. Without duty life is worthless. It holds no type of fulfillment. The simple fact that our bodies are built for work has to lead us to the conclusion that God (who made us) put us together to do His work. His work is different for each of us.

Mom, yours was to be the glue of our family, to be a pillar for those women (all women around you), Dad, yours was to train and build us (like a Platoon Sgt) to better serve Him. Kristie, Kim, Katy you are the five team leaders who support your Squad ldrs, Jodie, Robert and Richard. Lisa you too. You are my XO and you did a hell of a job. You all have your duties. Be thankful that God in His wisdom gives us work. Mine was to ensure that you did not have to experience what it takes to protect what we have as a family. This I am so thankful for. I know what honor is. It is not a word to be thrown around. It has been an Honor to protect and serve all of you. I faced death with the secure knowledge that you would not have to. This is as close to Christ-like I can be. That emulation is where all honor lies. I thank you for making it worthwhile.

As a Marine this is not the last Chapter. I have the privilege of being one who has finished the race. I have been in the company of heroes. I now am counted among them. Never falter! Don't hesitate to honor and support those of us who have the honor of protecting that which is worth protecting.

Now here are my final wishes. Do not cry! To do so is to not realize what we have placed all our hope and faith in. We should not fear. We should not be sad. Be thankful. Be so thankful. All we hoped for is true. Celebrate! My race is over, my time in war zone is over. My trials are done. A short time separates all of us from His reality. So laugh. Enjoy the moments and your duty. God is wonderful.

I love each and every one of you.

Spread the word .... Christ lives and He is Real.

Semper Fidelis



from a DGD email
 
Monday, February 20, 2006
  Daily Chuck
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  But he's not bitter!
 
Sunday, February 19, 2006
  Daily Chuck
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  almost makes sense
Just another example of Engrish
 
Saturday, February 18, 2006
  Daily Chuck
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  make up your mind
 
Friday, February 17, 2006
  Chips and Salsa
...man, they love to give this stuff away!

I sat at my local Frontera, waiting on some friends to join me for
dinner, and in the course of 15 minutes I was asked three times if I wanted
chips and salsa to go with my cerveza.
The last one to ask was the manager. Do they have a quota they have to meet? Or do they just get a really good deal on the stuff?

Or is it something more sinister than that? Is there some sort of poison in the salsa that activates when combined with the crunchy goodness of the tortilla chips? Possibly even a mind control drug, forcing you to order the daily special of beef enchilada, rice, and beans.

Whatever it was, I just didn't want any at the time. I did, however, manage to plow through an entire basket of the stuff once we were seated at our table. And the funny thing is, I don't really remember much of the rest of the night.

Coincidence?
 
  Daily Chuck
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  Everything you need for your "shotgun" wedding
The very definition of a convenience store
 
Thursday, February 16, 2006
  Oops, we did it again
Abu Ghraib.....the name conjures up pictures of US Military personnel abusing Iraqi POW'’s. And now with even more photo goodness!


As reported at Sky.com: New Abuse Pics Emerge

Now, are we really shocked? Did we think that it was a one time thing? Kinda like that time your girlfriend caught you cheating on her and you told her this was the first time and it would never happen again?

More importantly, do we really care?
Torture and human physical abuse should not happen in a civilized world, right? But is a time of war classified as "“civil"”?

Are the prisoners that are caught by the Iraqi'’s treated better? We'’ll never know, at least not from a media source. And that'’s the main issue here. Not the torture, not the debate over who is following Geneva Convention standards, but rather the flooding of television/radio/newpaper/internet with news of atrocity.

The less I know about the goings on of war, the better off I feel. Call it the "ostrich theory"” of daily living if you wish. Bottom line is we are propagandizing ourselves in the foot. I tend to agree with the Born Again Redneck: If a bit of information gleamed from smacking around a POW proves useful, then I'’m all for it.

Of course, we really have to hand to it to our troops. How hard is it NOT to take pictures? You guys are supposed to be smarter than that. This is not a frat boy kegger that gets out of hand and might prove to have embarrassing photos from some coeds, this is war ya dumb shit!
Things like this can get you removed from duty, and not in a good way. Good luck trying to find a job after you get back to the states and you’re photo'’s plastered all over the news with captioning that reads "“inhumane"”, "likes to torture"”, etc. It'’s not quite the same as being branded as one who does not play well with others.
 
  Daily Chuck
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  Daily Chuck
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  It's not just me, is it?
 
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
  Daily Chuck
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.


Chuck Norris Facts
 
  Chicken or the egg
Not quite sure how this one works, but I can only assume that the restuarant is probably one of the more fragrant places to eat
 
  Perspective
What do men want for Valentine’s Day?
They want no Valentine's Day. They would love it if Valentine's Day just went away. Men feel a lot of pressure on Valentine's Day.


Kinda like Japanese women. What?
Japanese women are fed up with a longstanding Valentine's Day custom requiring them to give chocolates to men without getting any in return.


Seems the tables are turned in Japan, and the women don’t like it.

So why not just do away with the holiday and make both sexes, in both cultures, happy?


I guess we “celebrate” Valentine’s Day because celebrating “Buy me something and you might get laid” Day is quite a mouthful and doesn’t fit well on the front of a card.
 
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
  This Valentine's Day.........
 
  Raj 2: Electric Boogaloo
As seen at "Birthday Breakdance"



In honor of a birthday, and, from what I hear, one helluva dance performance, I offer up the dancing MC Hammer:
 
  Daily Chuck
Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

Chuck Norris Facts
 
  Barmaid bring a pitcher
More importantly, in this case, don't drink and make signs!

yet another example of our government at work
 
Monday, February 13, 2006
  Huh?
hukked on fonix wurkd fur me, but if I truely am illiterate, then how the hell am I supposed to write for help?
The sad fact is that the marketing department for the Illiteracy Department thought that this was a good idea.
 
  Daily Chuck
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Chuck Norris Facts
 
  truth in advertising
As I was driving from Atlanta to Charlotte, I passed a tow-truck. This was not one of those trucks "for hire" that will pick up your broken-down heap and transport it to the nearest mechanic. No. This was a collection agency, a repossessor. How did I know? Simply by the words etched into the back window: Support your local repo man.....miss 2 payments.
 
Friday, February 10, 2006
  more like "Obvious & Redundant"

Good to know that the patrons of the morgue are still dead. It would be more of an observation and more newsworthy if 17 were alive!
 
  Sex, Lies, and videotape
OK, not really, but it caught your attention, didn't it?


STUART, Fla. -- A sheriff's deputy in Martin County is accused of dishonoring his badge after he was caught videotaping scantily clad women while he was on patrol.

He was supposed to be working, but instead the sheriff's office said on two days in October Munsey was making his own videos.

I've never been a cop, but I can imagine that if I spent my days driving around looking to pull people over for any minor traffic violation, I might start to play with some of the toys that were in the car as well.

The sheriff's office confiscated an hour and a half of videotape. Some of it shows Munsey just driving around, but much of the tape shows him focusing on women below the neck.

OK, so that proves that he's got a healthy sex drive.

Deputy Munsey showed another deputy that worked with him the videotape and that deputy wanted nothing to do with it and in fact told a supervisor," Atlas said.

And this guy was gay.

The sheriff's office fired Munsey, who was a 10-year veteran of the department.

10 year veteran of the police department. Ten years protecting and serving. And he gets fired for videotaping clothed adult women? First of all, why was this a public issue? Could this not have been handled internally? Secondly, he wasn't filming himself having sex with these women while in uniform, inside the squad car.

Come on people! What's the big freakin' deal? Was some form of punishment necessary for misappropriation of police department equipment? Certainly. Was firing the guy and turning the issue into a national news story a fitting way to handle the situation? Absolutely not.

especially considering the fact that the sheriff's office said it has not received any complaints about Munsey's taping or any sexually related complaints

Apparently there isn't any other crime to worry about in Martin County.
 
  Can new life be blown into politics?
or is it all an elaborate stage show meant to garner votes?

Just based on what I've read thus far, I would vote for the guy. Almost makes me want to say that I would move back to Ohio just to be able to vote for him. But that's never gonna happen, so we're just gonna have to hope that he is a new breed emerging and that change is coming.

Typically, I don't pay that much attention to politics. I vote during the presidential elections, but that's about it. Democratic U.S. Senate candidate Paul Hackett, he would provoke me to reach out and pull the lever for other elections.

Stumbled across this guy when Jen asked if he would be her president.

And I can really get behind his thought process.

With succinct coherence, Hackett said: “I’m pro-choice, I’m pro-gayrights, I’m pro-gun-rights. Call me nuts, but I think they’re all based on the same principle and that is we don’t need government dictating to us how we live our private lives.”

Asked to define being pro-gay rights, Hackett said anybody who tries to deny homosexuals the same rights, including marriage, as every other citizen is un-American. Are you saying, he was asked, that the 62 percent of Ohioans who voted in November 2004 to constitutionally deny same-sex marriages are un-American?

“If what they believe is that we’re going to have a scale on judging which Americans have equal rights, yeah, that’s un-American. They’ve got to accept that. It’s absolutely un-American.”


and you can read more from the Cleveland Plain Dealer
 
  Alba Tops New Playboy Sex List
Actress Jessica Alba has topped a new list of sexy stars, which has earned her a Playboy magazine cover.

(I liked this pic better than the one that was originally used with the story)
The Sin City beauty joins the likes of Jamie Pressly, Jenny McCarthy, Halle Berry, Pamela Anderson, Eva Longoria and Paris Hilton on Playboy's new 25 Sexiest Celebrities list.

All well and good. Boobies for everyone. But it's getting to a point where we're wasting our time with such a photo shoot. Look at the list above. Who out of that list haven't you already seen naked? Hell, 2 of the ladies on the list are former centerfolds as it is. Everyone saw Halle Berry naked in more than one movie, and who doesn't remember the Paris Hilton sex tape?

Bottom line is: don't we already pay enough attention to the celebs? Do we need to "honor" them with more titles? And who is it that determines exactly who is a "sexy celebrity"?

I guess it's time to switch back to amateur porn and quit getting worked up over the possibility of seeing a famous nipple.
 
  pee shy?
Check out these pictures of a public toilet in Houston, TX where all the walls are made of one-way mirrors.

No one can possibly see in, but its a little tough for most to "expose themselves" to this situation when complete strangers are casually walking by.



Just spend another moment scrolling down to see how it looks from the inside. It's made entirely out of one-way glass. No one can see you in there, but when you are inside, it looks like you're sitting in a clear glass box.


Would you or could you use it ?

Ran across this while surfing through Raj's tags.
 
  I've been going to the wrong company
Never have I received "prompt attention" from a dry cleaner. Apparently I was unaware of the appropriate protocol!
 
Thursday, February 09, 2006
  Everyone has more.......









 
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
  Baby on Board
It's one thing to be white trash. It's another thing to be white trash as observed by the media.

It was bad enough that Britney Spears and K-Fed got hitched and made a spectacle of themselves on national television, but now that they have hatched an offspring, things just seem to get worse.

Britney's beloved baby sits on her lap while she drives around Malibu



Apparently, Britney (heretofore referred to as Dumbass) was waiting on her bodyguard to return from Starbucks with coffee. Now while she was waiting, Dumbass took her child out of the protective custody of the car seat. The bodyguard returns with the coffee, and Dumbass, feeling she was in danger from the paparazzi, speeds off without returning the child to the safety of the car seat.

What's the worst that could have happened if Dumbass, baby, and bodyguard are all in the car? Some shutterbug is gonna snap a pic of her drinking a mochachino? Take the time to return the kid to the car seat, AS REQUIRED BY LAW! If Dumbass really felt that she was in imminent danger, then it doesn't really seem like the bodyguard was doing his job.

So now you've got the LA Sheriff's Dept. "investigating" the situation. Investigating? What the hell is there to investigate? There is photographic evidence of the laws this woman broke.

If it was me, Georgia State Patrol would have pulled me over and at a minimum issued me a citation for the law that was being broken. I don't even want to think about the involvement of DFACS.

Dumbass probably won't even get the minimum of a slap on the wrist. And why? CELEBRITY = special treatment.

On the upside, even though this story has inundated the news media, at least I haven't been forced to listen to anything off of K-Fed's new album.
 
  The Star Wars Episode 3 you didn't see
You pretty much get the whole story in 6 minutes, and it's acted out about as well as the original!
Freakin' funny.

click the pic to watch the video

as seen at: Google Video of the Day
 
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
  Pre-nup???
Bluffs Man Accused Of Creating Marriage Contract

COUNCIL BLUFFS, Iowa --

..prosecutors allege he devised a marriage contract to establish what his wife was to do, and when she was to do it.

Frey's wife also provided police with an alleged "marriage contract," which was entitled "Contract of Wifely Expectations." In it, Frey allegedly gave his wife chances to earn "good behavior days" -- or GBDs -- by complying with certain demands, such as hygiene and self-care. "You will shave every third day," the contract states ... You will be naked within 20 minutes of the kids being in bed."

The document spells out how many points can be earned by performing certain sex acts.

(A contract Frey's wife has stated she did not sign, by the way)

Now I personally don't have any problem having stipulations for both spouses written out. Might even make some things less complicated. But I think there should be a caveat for review and revision as time goes on.

Of course, there's more to this story than just a contractual marriage. But then again, if it weren't for the alleged kidnapping, abuse, and child pornography charges, this never woulda made the news.


and now to inspire more wrath than could possibly be necessary (and that's not just from the feminists).....
From Housekeeping Monthly, 13 May, 1955:

The Good Wife's Guide

* Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.

* Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

* Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

* Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.

* During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

* Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.

* Be happy to see him.

* Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

* Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

* Don't greet him with complaints and problems.

* Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.

* Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

* Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

* Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

* A good wife always knows her place.
 
  DJ Vader
breakin' it down old skool

click the pics to watch the video

For those that like star wars and a bit of scratchin' at the same time

as seen at: Google Video of the Day
 
Monday, February 06, 2006
  Single-Malt computing
Dude turned a Ballentine's Whiskey bottle into a PC

Check out the process here: Whiskey PC
I apparently don't have enough time on my hands.......
 
  Football? We want commercials!
For those of you that typically watch the SuperBowl for the commercials, just wait til the next day and find it on the web, that way you don't have to put your self through unnecessary football pain.

SuperBowl Commercials

In my humble opinion, Anheuser-Busch still has the best marketing, but the Sprint ring tone spot was definitely a winner! It was about time to update Benny Hill for the modern times.
 
  Never gonna happen in the US
LensCrafters will never air something like this in the states.

The following is a German commercial for a one-hour optical store.


click the pic to watch the video


and if you don't laugh, I will personally refund your money, I guarantee it!

as seen at: Google Video of the Day
 
  verbage
I love it when old people refer to one another as "light weight". And by "old", I mean late 40's thru mid-50's.

This is a term that I learned in college, as used by college students.

But as I was sitting at the bar at La Hacienda, eating my enchilada and drinking my Corona, I overheard the 2 ladies a few spots down talking about "you remember what happened that last time you drank like that". Followed by, "well, you know I'm a light weight". That's almost like hearing your parents talk like that, and that's just not right.

I was unaware of the fact that "adults" spoke in such a manner. Looks like I don't really have to change too much as I continue to grow up.
 
Friday, February 03, 2006
  Ain't nothin' but mammals


as seen at: Google Video of the Day


There's one guy in here that reminds me of Ryan. Not the Sloth version of Ryan, but rather the normal version. (Well, "normal" if you discount the monkey suit.)

So go ahead, click the pic and watch the video for Bloodhound Gang's "Bad Touch"
 
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
  Transition
n 1: the act of passing from one state or place to the next [syn: passage]

2: an event that results in a transformation [syn: conversion, changeover]

3: a change from one place or state or subject or stage to another
 
  Top Ten Drawbacks to Working in a Cubicle
10. Being told to "think outside the box" when you're in a freakin' box all day long

9. Not being able to check e-mail attachments without turning around to see who's behind you

8. Cubicle walls do not offer much protection from any kind of gun fire

7. That nagging feeling that if you press the right button, you'll get a piece of cheese

6. Lack of roof rafters for the noose

5. The walls are too close together for the hammock to work right

4. 23 power cords - 1 outlet

3. Prison cells are not only bigger, they also have beds

2. The carpet has been there since 1976 and shows more signs of life than your coworkers

And... the number one drawback to working in a cubicle....

1. You can't walk out and slam the door when you quit
 
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Kevin O'Mellan (Whittington Appraisals): Appraiser in Salisbury, Rowan County, North Carolina



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