How to pee politely
The teacher asked:
"Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"
Michael said, "Just a minute I have to go pee."
The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite. What about you Peter? How would you say it?"
Peter said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."
"That's better", the teacher said, "but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table."
"And you, Richard, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?"
Richard responded to this inquiry, "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner."
The teacher fainted.