Reason #53 why I don't go to church
Assualt with a deadly weapon
OK, so it wasn't really a deadly weapon, but my sister did smack a fellow parishoner in the head with the offering plate this past Sunday. And I don't mean "lightly brushed up against him" either, I mean full-on, two-handed-arcing-swing, I want you to see stars kind of smack-down.
It was probably the most entertaining moment in the church's history. But I'm guessing it wasn't all that entertaining for the guy that got hit.
And if you were to ask my sister, she'll tell you it was an accident. But I'm pretty sure she's been harboring a grudge.
Joyful giving? Not on her watch.