I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do.
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane.
Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid, fat
mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me
get you some nice Legos instead. Maybe you can build yourself a family with those?
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