Wiggles Concert 10/25/2004 I wanted to let everyone know that the concert event of the millenium occurred last night, Monday, 10/25/04, at 6:30 P.M.
This was the first concert experience for Connor.
No. It wasn't Elvis. No. it was the Rolling Stones. No. it was Velvet Revolver. No. it wasn't George Clinton and the Parliament Funkadelic. It wasn't anything anyone would have guessed unless they already knew.
It was The Wiggles!
Yes, I said it. The Wiggles. What's a Wiggle, one might ask. I found myself with that same question roughly two years ago. Having children tends to broaden your horizens in ways you never thought possible.
The Wiggles are a group of entertainers for children. They are Australian. This only adds to my theory that nothing good comes out of Australia. Except Foster's beer and Kylie Minogue.
I have come to learn that the Wiggles are a powerhouse in the ways of entertaining our young. Have you ever seen a child in front of the television, tuned to the Disney channel, oblivious to anything else that is going on due to the fact that these four guys are dancing and singing? The house could be on fire, their leg could be caught in a bear trap, you could've just smashed their favorite toy, and told them that mommy and daddy don't love them anymore and are shipping them off to live with the circus. None of the above would matter. The Wiggles command that much attention.
Between the deal that the Wiggles have with Disney, the videos, the tours, the merchandise, these guys have the potential to be a bigger money making maching than the Rolling Stones. I'm just waiting for Murray to start endorsing Gibson guitars, Jeff to make commercials for the Serta mattress company, etc., etc.
The Wiggles might not mean anything to most of you now, but just wait! Whitt, this is specifically pointed at you. It's like a drug to these kids. But can also be used as a bargaining chip, that is if you're the type that negotiates with your kid. If you're me, you just lock him in the closet until he cries so much that he falls asleep due to exhaustion.
Anyway, I digress. We went to the Arena at Gwinnet Center last night to watch this phenomenom in person. Let me just say that it is a good thing that the camera adds about 20 pounds to these guys. I used to think that they were all stoned out of their gourds from what I saw on television. Obviously, I was very wrong. These gaunt, skeleton-like performers must be addicted to crack. Or have serious eating disorders. And contrary to popular belief, YES they DO lip sync. Their official website states that they DO NOT lip sync. But I call shenanigans. SHENANIGANS! SHENANIGANS!
Seeing as how we had such fantastic seats down on the floor level and were only about 10 rows away from the stage, we had the perfect vantage point to witness the performers turning their mics off for the singing and turning them back on for the talking.
BUSTED
All things being equal, I would do it again. The joy/shock/fear/fun coctail is well worth it when you see your child's face light up. Connor had a HUGE time, singing, dancing, mimicing the motions. I could watch that all day every day. Let's remember that I'm saying that I would watch Connor, NOT the Wiggles all day every day.
And I don't think that I have enough disk space to go into how much of a Wiggles groupie my wife is.
I have attached a document so that all of you can get a good view of the force that is taking over America, one child at a time.
Oh yeah, if ever there was a non-prescription form of birth control, just head to any arena sized event that is specifically aimed at small children.. You get 10,000 of the little buggers together in the same room and you'll think twice!!
  ¶ 8:23 AM